Fears.

Having been playing water polo for 3 years, I got used to swim in a swimming pool. When you swim in a swimming pool every day for three years, you become very used at being able to see the bottom of the pool, and everything that is going on under water. You also become accustomed to the idea that there are no unforeseen creatures or dangers under the water, with the possible exception of an unnecessary kick coming from underwater… But nothing too bad. 

Basically, what I see inside of every wave, haha!

The ocean, on the other hand, in very different. The ocean is violent, messy, and unpredictable. To me, the ocean is scary, because I don't know what is going on below me. If you have you ever been surfing in the SB area, you know that when you look down, you see nothing. You see water, but you can’t see through it. You can only see that greenish color that results from the combination of the blue reflection of the sky up above and the yellowish movement of sand underneath. The very fact that there could be something under me that I don't know of, kinda freaks me out. 

What I see in waves in which I don't see seaweed monsters. LOL

In addition, ocean waves are big and powerful, and when the ocean gets agitated, it’s harder to get back to the shore. I grew up in Italy, and we don't have the open ocean like in the United States. Instead, we have the Mediterranean Sea, which is calm, usually clear and limpid water; at least it is at the beaches where I have been hanging out during summer as I grew up. The waves in the Mediterranean are… well, not really waves! They are small, so you never have to worry about being sucked into a wave and having to keep your breath and play dead while you are catapulted to the bottom of the sea :)

In other words, while I love being in the water, I am a little scared of the ocean. However, I really love surfing and I use this as a reason or motivation to face and win my fear. Usually I go surfing with my friend Isaac, however this morning I went by myself for the first time. 

I woke up feeling rested and happy at 9 o’ clock. I opened the door of my house, stepped outside, and I was welcomed by the heat of the sun and the freshness of the oceanic breeze. So I decided I would go surfing. I put on my wetsuit, grabbed my board, and walked to the ocean, where I realized that there was nobody else out. 

A picture of my playing with a seal. Cute! haha

“That’s scary!” — I thought; “what if something bad happens and there’s nobody around to help me or even realize I am in trouble?” I told myself that nothing bad was going to happen, and I started paddling out. I stayed in the water for about 45 minutes, and I had a good time. I even got to see a seal and I thought it was really cute. Many times I had a temptation to leave, but I always told myself I should stay, partly for the challenge of winning my fear and partly for the desire of catching another wave.

When I got out of the water I felt really good about my morning, in part for being able to face my fear of being alone in the ocean, and in part because I felt fortunate and grateful for living right by the ocean and being able to go surf on a Wednesday morning. 

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Long story short, facing your fears is the only way to win them, and you should do it. 

I really like this quote.

It may take some time, but I think that there’s nothing wrong with being scared of some things. While they are not an issue for me, many people are scared of spiders or other insects, some are disturbed by clowns, and I even know people who are afraid of… having feelings! Everybody has some fears, and I think being able to admit it demonstrates maturity and self-consciousness, and as Socrates would put it, it is of fundamental importance to Know Thyself. Being able to admit your fears and not being ashamed of them is the first step to win them, and facing your fears will make you grow as a person.

A presto,

- Fede